I've talked about body confidence before and my general struggles with it. As much as I am all about everyone loving themselves, it really can be easier said than done.
Over the last few years I've found my attitude towards my own self yo-yoing all over the place. One minute I am putting out a blog post talking about loving my 'touching thighs', the next minute I am looking at myself in the mirror and hating everything I see.
In a world where social media is king and everyone wants to show the best version of themselves, that mindset of comparing yourself can creep in.
To try tackle my body confidence woes, I participated in a boudoir photo shoot with the incredibly talented Yemi King. Yes you read that right.... boudoir.
Now I have always wanted to do a boudoir shoot before but my lack of confidence always got in the way. I would say to myself: "do it when you look better" "you need to tone up first" "Emily you look like a frog, frogs are not sexy".
I decided to ignore that little voice and go for it when Yemi asked if I wanted to do my very own shoot.
Feeling nervous as hell I rolled up to Nira Caledonia in Stockbridge, I was quite honestly have second thoughts. What if I looked awful? What if I was just so bad that Yemi would tell me to just go home as there was no way she could make me look decent?
Once I got my make up on, put on my lingerie set and had a pep talk from Yemi herself, I was ready to go. Well as ready as I ever would be.
Quite honestly I felt pretty uncomfortable at first. There I was lying on a bed, in my underwear with someone talking pictures of me. Also Lucie was there.... (Which was a good thing, except for when she chucked a pillow right in my face...)
Yemi was amazing though and she put me so at ease. When it comes to getting my photo taken I never know what to do with myself. Where do I put my arms? Do my legs look wonky? Am I smiling or grimacing? Yemi talked me through every step of the way, showing me poses or just coming over and putting me into those poses.
She made me go from a nervous wreck to a somewhat sexy empowering woman!
So here are three snaps I received from the photo shoot. You may have already seen them on social media but look again.
Look at me being kinda confident and not looking like a massive grumpy monster.
|Yemi King Photo|
|Yemi King Photo|
|Yemi King Photo|
As I said my good friend Lucie was there for support and she snapped some behind the scenes images as well which was awesome. You know you have a good friendship when you happily allow them to take pictures of you semi naked for their Instagram...
So do I feel different about my own body since after the shoot? Yes actually. The day I received the pictures I was nervous all over again. Even though I know Yemi is an amazing photographer, I was so sure that I would still look terrible.
Clicking open the link she set me, I was kinda blown away. I looked, dare I say, pretty. Yes there was a couple that made me go "put it away Emily" but the majority made me so happy. I had never seen myself in that way before and I didn't hate it.
I have lump, bumps, stretch marks, scars, spots, jiggly bits etc but that shouldn't stop me from loving myself. Nor should it stop you.
Seeing myself in that way has given me a different perceptive on myself. I doubt that I am ever going to truly love myself but doing this photo shoot gave me the kick up the arse I needed to put myself back on track to be body confident.
I honesty cannot recommend Yemi enough and if you get the chance to do something like this, you should take it. You don't need to share the images like I did and they don't need to be for a 'partner'. It may not be for everyone but the confidence boast I received was amazing.
Have you ever done a boudoir shoot before? Would you want to?
Till the next time!